What
family?
Fewer marital unions, higher
cohabitations and rising dissociation
rates
While the concept of work-family has mostly been preoccupied with the
conflicting roles of each domain, and now increasingly how to integrate
them, the positive impacts of family in providing belonging and support
are less studied. In addition, the work facet of the relationship has
received more attention than the family facet, so that there have been
more interventions and reorganizations in the former than the latter.
This could be because work relations are easier to regulate than are
family relations, or on the basis that family issues fall within the
private domain. However, the rising number of mental health issues
around the globe actively call for research into contributors of
well-being. Family support has always been singled out as a means of
providing psychological resources for individuals and within the work
context, are important in buffering the stress of work, leading to
better coping. As already observed, the new age of work guarantees a
fair amount of stress, whether with uncertainty, the pressures
associated with upskilling or even with finding meaning. This is where
it gets a little complicated for the ‘Millennial’ worker. The last half
of the century has seen a sharp decline in marriage rates, almost
globally. argue that ‘Millennials’ are getting married much later than
preceding generations. at the time of her study observed that the
average age of entry into marriage for Americans had increased from 23
to 29 for men and from 20 to 27 in women. Within sub-Saharan Africa,
marriage was thought to be universal and a requisite for adulthood. No
longer. South Africa’s documentation of declining marriage rates, an
exercise that has been ongoing since the 1960s, places the current
median age of marriage for both genders at 30. In Kenya, the median age
of marriage for women is 22 while that for men is 26, up from 21 and 24
respectively.
Some of the reasons ascribed to the growing trend include a reversal of
the education gap in favour of women, crippling student loans, an
increase in unwed births, which lower women’s marriageability, and the
fact that attaining the benchmarks thought to be necessary predecessors
to marriage, that is, employment stability, accrued savings and
financial security, are taking longer to realize. Although these
statistics might paint a picture of disinterest in marriage, the
situation is far from accurate. In place of marriage, cohabitation is
the new form of unionization for this age group . In addition, marriage
and parenthood are increasingly viewed as detached concepts, so that for
example in most ‘Millennials’ ranked the desire to be a parent higher
than the desire to have a successful marriage. In come the proliferation
of all kinds of alternative family concepts such as “living apart
together,” “cocooning.” and “helicopter parenting”, which has
nothing to do with the aircraft. And these forms of cohabitation are
differently nuanced from the previous understanding of cohabitation as a
preparatory stage to marriage. In fact, ’s study shows that not only is
marriage not a consideration at the onset of cohabitation, it now serves
as a waiting point for breaking up, because the cohabiting couple
envision a future date when the relationship will end. The concept of an
expiry date for love springs from the high rates of divorce witnessed by
the parents of this 28-38 age cohort, the commoditization of love on
factual television shows such as ‘Love is Blind’ or ‘Married at First
Sight’ and online dating and matching sites which fail in their promise
to deliver the perfect spouse.
The result is an upsurge of single-parent families, mostly female-headed
with the elderly also brought in, especially in the African set-up to
care for children. In essence then, the ‘Millennial’ worker, is deprived
of the support component from the family set up, making the challenges
at work particularly devastating.
Thinning family support and higher
care burdens within the African
context
One of the most recognized attributes of African culture is the
centrality of family or kinship. Far from the common conceptualization
of family as a nuclear institution, the African family casts a wide net
of membership to include in-laws, grand-parents, grandchildren, unborn
children and even intermediaries like ancestors. Even the idea of
personhood derives from the place of fitting within the community, so
that a person feels seen and knows that they belong. This communal
understanding of family creates a center of learning, enables family
members to counsel the younger generation, provide mediation when
domestic conflicts arise, act as a source of financial support during
crises and provide attendance to joyous events such as births and
weddings. argues that the traditionally low incidences of suicide in
Africa stem from the feeling of belongingness and the assurance that
others are concerned with the welfare of the person involved, making
life worth living. In order to perpetuate the culture of cooperation and
friendship, African communities look for any odd reason to meet and
share a meal. So central is this idea of kinship, that various ties are
less ‘God’s truth’ relationships, extending to assumed, analogous, or
just plainly fictitious ties, such as when Africans meet abroad and
formulate some sort of communal tie. But those days are slowly coming to
an end. Rapid urbanization has seen many young people concentrate in
cities, slowly lose use of their local dialects and begin to consider
family in nucleated terms. The reduced contact between family members,
on account of the business presented by the new age of work, ultimately
weakens family ties, leaving the ‘Millennial’ worker to figure out life
with little support. At the same time, the burdens to which the
community traditionally came in to intervene are now squarely falling on
the ‘Millennial’ worker who in most cases has no family of their own or
who is within a family setup that is waiting to disintegrate. The upshot
of sub-Saharan Africa’s non-communicable disease burden by 67% within
two decades and the fact that African countries have now a higher burden
of NCDs compared to global averages means that ‘Millennials’ are
devoting a substantial part of their paycheck to support ailing
relatives.
At the apex of these responsibilities is parenting in a digital age.
Even though the internet has made parenting easier in some ways, such as
through providing parenting skills and allowing for greater
communication between parents across country lines, it presents
challenges in other quotas. Internet safety and technology addiction are
prime examples. Parents have a primary obligation, even in the digital
age, to be good role models of internet usage, and then, just like in
the workplace, to inform their understandings on social media and other
digital spaces, enough to safely guide their children. Providing
alternative activities offline for children so that they grow in healthy
and interactive ways is also critical. However, urban housing especially
in high density neighborhoods, compounded by the obliteration of green
spaces to create more real estate space is challenging the feasibility
of extra-curricular activities.